


lack of words / I’ve never been

by M3zzaTh3M3z



Series: Widdershins Prompt Fills [3]
Category: Widdershins (Webcomic)
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Canon, Prompt Fill, Queer-Platonic Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-09
Updated: 2019-08-09
Packaged: 2020-08-13 22:29:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20181757
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/M3zzaTh3M3z/pseuds/M3zzaTh3M3z
Summary: Prompt: At my worst, I worry you’ll realise you deserve better. At my best, I worry you won’t. (I’ve never been better.)Mal gets into a bar fight, and interrupts Wolfe’s evening with a girl.





	lack of words / I’ve never been

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Toe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toe/gifts).

> what’s the point of doing a ton of prompts if not to go wild with weird titles huh  
This one’s for Menkhu on tumblr :) (I hope I got your ao3 right??)
> 
> I’ll fix formatting in the morning on my laptop!

“Hold still,” Wolfe scolded, as he did his best to clean up the cuts and bruises pummelled across Mal’s face. It was difficult by firelight, with only rudimentary supplies and Mal squirming under his touch, but by now he’d had a lot of practice. He spoke in German - he often slipped into it when taking care of his strange companion - but by now Mal had picked up enough for conversation, and certainly for this.

“I am,” Mal replied, his accent rough and garbled by a nasty swollen lip. He hissed as Wolfe wiped away some blood from his cheek. “Ow!”

Wolfe lowered the cloth and looked him in the eye, trying to sound stern. “There’s no point complaining, it’s your own fault.”

“Is not.”

“I saw you throw the first punch.” Glowering, Mal lowered his eyes and reached for a cigarette, but Wolfe swatted his hand. “Not until I’m done. That is your punishment for starting fights. Really, whatever got into you?”

“He was cross I beat him.”

“So are many people. You don’t punch them all.” Wolfe lay down the cloth and picked up some dressing. Mal might look strange having to wear it round his face for a few days, but it was better than getting an infection. He’d had on a few months ago in the winter, and it had been scarier than Wolfe liked to remember. “Right as I was leaving with the lovely Frau as well,” he said wistfully, beginning to apply the dressing. He didn’t often spend the night with strangers, but if he met someone truly lovely then why not? “I don’t think she minded, except one of the young men I hit was her brother. I tried to explain I only hit him because he hit you, but she was still upset. A pity, she was a charming girl. So amusing, and her hair! She had the most beautiful red hair, it was just like...” He trailed off. Mal was trembling slightly under his touch, lips pressed tight together and eyes swimming with tears. “Come now,” he said, tilting his head to try meet Mal’s eyes. “Don’t be a child, it cannot hurt all that bad.”

Scrunching his eyes shut, Mal shook his head and batted away Wolfe’s hand. When he spoke again, it was in English, his voice on the edge of cracking. “Do y’know how long ye’ve been wi’ me?”

That hadn’t been what Wolfe was expecting. “Perhaps a year?” he guessed. He hadn’t thought to note the exact dates.

“A month over. Ye can... Ye know ye can go home, right?”

Wolfe froze, then slowly drew back. An uncomfortable feeling settled in his stomach. It felt a bit like when Mal had that fever. “Go home?”

“Yer not stuck wi’ me,” Mal muttered, wrapping his arms around himself. “Ye can go back whenever ye like. Or anywhere. Wi’out me.”

“I... yes, of course I know,” Wolfe replied, the sick feeling worsening.

“Prob’ly fed up o’ me by now. Always causin’ you trouble.”

“You do not.”

“Can’t do crowds, can’t talk t’ people, get in fights, ruin yer chances sleepin’ wi’ people...” Mal ticked each off, one by one on his fingers. His eyes hardened, not letting the tears fall, but didn’t wipe them away either. “An’ what kind o’ life is this fer someone like you? Travellin’ all th’ time, sleepin’ outside, not eatin’ fer days, when ye could have a proper home an’ family an’ that?”

Wolfe frowned, unable to put his finger exactly on what sounded so wrong with Mal’s words. Once upon of time he’d felt destined for a normal home, a normal family a normal life. No more. “This is the life I chose.”

“Ye deserve better!” Mal burst out, and his shoulders were shaking now, these pent up fears too much for his narrow frame to withstand. “I keep waitin’ fer ye t’ realise, but y’don’t, an’...” His voice cracked and he continued in a whisper. “I was glad, ‘cause it meant ye were ‘ere. That’s selfish though, an’ yer not selfish, yer good. Th’ best. So I figure I could be a little bit good, jus’ once, an’ tell ye t’ go.”

Even just the idea was like the ground dropping away from under him. A year and a month ago Wolfe had followed Mal through those trees, over that fence, down that road and had never looked back. Not once had he felt alone, or adrift, not like he had done in the army where he theoretically had much more companionship and purpose. This was his real life, not whatever that had been. “Do you want me to go?” he asked, unable to keep the fear from creeping in.

Mal’s eyes widened, shockingly blue even in the flickering firelight, and Wolfe realised perhaps the fear was literally creeping in too. He’d long since accepted Mal taking his distress as his own, though he never quite got used to it. “Course not,” Mal said, hands flying wildly about. “Yer my -“ He faltered over the missing word, the one neither of them had known how exactly to fill for quite some time. “Yer my... yer my Wolfe,” he finished for lack of a better word, frowning a little in concentration as he carefully made the correct pronunciation.

Laying one hand on Mal’s shoulder, Wolfe smiled. He wasn’t going anywhere. “And you are my Mal. Troubles and all.”

Mal ducked his head with the kind of huffing sound he did that was supposed to mean, ‘stop being sappy, it’s annoying,’ but actually meant, ‘stop being sappy, it’s nice and that’s making me embarrassed.’ A familiar sound by now.

“May I finish the dressing?” Wolfe asked, picking up the things again.

Mal nodded. Wolfe pretended not to notice how he rubbed his tears away. “Aye. Thanks.”

It didn’t take long, and soon Mal was as patched up as he was going to get. “There,” Wolfe said, leaning back. “Now we are out of everything, so please avoid getting punched so much again anytime soon.”

“‘s not like I do it fer fun,” Mal grumbled.

“I know. Which is why it is all the stranger you started it this time.”

“I didn’t start it! He said you -“

Wolfe frowned. “It was about me?”

Sighing, Mal dug into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette with a look that dared Wolfe to try stop him. “It was that girl’s brother. He was mad I won, saw we came in together, saw you ‘bout t’ leave wi’ his sister, started mouthin’ off sayin’ yer...” He scowled as he sucked in a deep breath and slowly released. “All sorts o’ things really, ye didn’t deserve her, all o’ that. I jus’... lost me temper a bit.”

Wolfe couldn’t help it. He chuckled, and Mal looked at him in surprise. “All these people worrying about who I do or don’t deserve, or who deserves me. I rather think it is up to me who I am with, no?”

“Hold on, it’s not th’ -“

“For tonight, yes, I would rather be in a warm bed with that nice girl than here fixing your face in a cold forest.” Wolfe laughed a little as Mal squirmed in place - he was allowed a little payback even if Mal had been ‘defending his honour’ in a funny way of his. “For a year, or more, however long you will have me, I would take the forest with you over a house without every time.”

**Author's Note:**

> I got like uhhh 2 or 3 prompts left I’m having fun zipping through these so I hope everyone else enjoys too and let me know what you think ^_^ thanks for reading these lmao


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